Assignment 17: Learnage Some Verbage

Use the following words in your everyday conversation speech today...

- bowel
- cheese
- chainmail
- wizardry
- craptastic

Assignment 16: Wishing You...

Today, secretly make up a birthday card for a coworker.

Oh, it doesn't matter if it's their birthday or not. It's actually better if it's not. Take your handmade card around to other coworkers and make them sign it and leave cutesy messages.

Ask them what they got the birthday boy/girl, then stare at them with contempt as they stumble over their excuses for forgetting a coworker's birthday.

Deliver the birthday card anonymously at the end of the day. If anyone mentions it in the future, feign ignorance, then proclaim that it wasn't even that person's birthday that day.

Assignment 15: An Impossible Mission.

Declare to one of your friends that you're on a mission.

Any mission will do, be it going to the grocery store, or stopping by the University, or even taking out the trash. Force your friend to scout ahead, and get very upset when he doesn't sing the theme song that you've made up for youselves. Don't forget to give each other spy names, and don't forget to name your mission something innocuous but charming.

When you get home from your mission, jump in the air and shout "Mission Accomplished!" Then treat yourself to chocolate.

Or a maragarita, depending on your age range.

Assignment 14: A Little Bit Softer Now

The next conversation you have - at a pause or awkward stopping point - gently whisper "a little bit softer now" - like from the song "Shout" and featured in the little known film "Animal House."

If they freeze and look at you like you are insane - 0 points.

If the person says "shout!" back at you - 2 points.

If they say "shout" and then start dancing - 76 points and a bottle of hooch!

Assignment 13: Pass It On

When you drive to work today - or maybe an errand or two, when you are getting ready to go, leave a note on the car next to you - not a mean nasty not like the ones I have recieved before, but a totally random one.

Like

"Your lucky number today is 8"

or

"The cheese really does stand alone"

or

"When I was a young lad/lass, my older brother Clint used to make me eat dirt pies untill one day I took the dirt pie and smacked it in his dirty clothes hamper. My mom and dad thought he had bowel issues and Clint had to go on medicine. I love my brother."

And at the bottom of your note write:
"pass it on"

Assignment 12: Lady (or Gent) in Red

You open your closet door. So many clothes.

Today, pick all the red clothing you have and wear them all...at the same time.


But if all you have is one red shirt, or maybe red sock, go ahead, put 'em on. I mean, you'll know why you're wearing red today. And isn't that what matters?

Assignment 11: Love thyself.

You feeling good, baby? Yeah? You like it when the lights are low? I like you, lights on or off, if you know what I mean, I think we-

What? Oh! Oh, right! The assignment. Sorry, I can be easily distracted, especially when what's on my mind is...

Love.

That's right. The Big 'L'. Today's assignment is one I think we're all going to enjoy doing:

Write a love letter to yourself.

Now, I don't care if it's written from your point of view or as someone else to you. It can be anonymously penned or you can sign it. The point of the exercise is to make yourself feel good by pointing out the qualities in yourself that you enjoy. For example, mine would read, "Oh, Sterling. I think your tendency to fantasize in the middle of giving out assignments is sooo sexy. I want you right now!"

And then I'd kiss my arm.

In fact, since it's TGIF, I want you to take this assignment up a notch. Add a little BAM! Emeril would say.

I want you, after writing this missive to yourself, to tell your friends you got a love letter, then read it to them.

Tell us how it goes.

Assignment 10: A little Awkward

Give some one a hug.

Easy enough.


But when you are giving the hug? Hold on just a little bit longer than you usually would.


...until your special hugging friend feels, well, a little awkward.

Assignment 9: Rhyme Time!

See how long you and a friend can rhyme with one another, while still keeping it a conversation.

For example:

"Hey, how're you?"

"I'm okay. Just a little blue."

"That's okay, That my cue to cheer you up and make troubles unglue!"


The more complex you can get, the more internal rhyming you can hold to, the better your rhyme time will be.*



*(Also, Elizabeth promised a bottle of hooch to whoever can do this one the longest. Let us know your best times!)

Assignment 8: Freeze Frame

You know the "jump, click heels, freeze frame" so often used to invoke great joy for a character in cinema classics, namely those in the 70's? Well, when something remotely positive happens today, go ahead, jump, click those heels.

And if you can freeze frame yourself - well, then, kudos - I'll even click my heels for you.
And buy you a bottle of hooch.

Assignment 7: Once More With Feeling!

Today I want you to be in a musical.

If you go to the grocery store, sing your grocery list in the aisles. If you go to the bank, sing a ballad about your money woes to the teller. If you go to get your hair done, sing a ditty about perming.

If life was more like a musical, first of all, we'd all be able to dance and none of us would be tone deaf.

Second of all? We'd be a peaceful race, because it's much much harder to sing while you're in a war.

Unless you're a hobbit, then you sing about everything, all the time.